I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Randomize