He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize