she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
