I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
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