i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
if i died would you start the facebook group?
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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