you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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