She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
