i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
She made me pour olive oil on her.
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