Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Randomize
