whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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