I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Randomize
