So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
He literally asked permission to hit on me
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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