Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
