I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
