i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
the liver wants what the liver wants
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Randomize