Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
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