Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Randomize
