Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Randomize
