A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
