Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
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i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
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We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
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