Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Randomize
