: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
