The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
