Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
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