Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize
