the day after is always just damage control
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
