these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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