I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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