trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
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