do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
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