that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
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