dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
he just fucked me for my cheese.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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