Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
