I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
