Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
