Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Randomize
