I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
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