It's Friday. Sex?
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
