You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
worst night to have a conscience
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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