I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
