uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
he told me I talked like a deaf person
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
