I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My penis needs a shock collar
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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