Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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