Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
