It's Friday. Sex?
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
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