He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
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