She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I have aggressive nipples.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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