I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I intend to get homeless drunk
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Randomize
