never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Randomize
