Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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