No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
